The Same River Twice

September 14, 2020
Mandel, a travel writer and Nerd’s Eye View blogger, recalls her tumultuous youth abroad in this edgy, unfiltered travel narrative. In high school, unmoored by her parents’ divorce, Mandel shuffled between living with friends and family, failed classes, and snorted cocaine. Upon graduation, her “future a foggy wasteland,” her parents sent her to a kibbutz in Israel. There, she found a sense of place and friendship among the travelers and locals, and fell in love with a young Israeli soldier. When they broke up, Mandel “felt displaced” again, and began a relationship with Alastair, an unemployed Brit in his 20s who was kicking around Israel. Alastair became abusive, and they traveled across Europe, then back to Israel, where Mandel had a miscarriage. She continued to travel with Alastair, including to Egypt and India, and on brief solo side-trips she felt “lighter” and “fearless,” and finally determined to leave him and return to California and college. Mandel’s introspective approach (“I was afraid... that I deserved everything I received”) is leavened with wit about the role of “lost girls and boys.” (“Wendy ends up getting the shitty end of things... sewing Peter Pan’s shadow.”) Rather than a pat conclusion, Mandel comes away with a mix of regret and “sheer wonder” about the memories and life experience her travels gave her. Messy but provocative, Mandel’s chaotic coming-of-age story is emotionally hard to read, but also hard to put down.